Bring up Baba by Birsa-1

This is first in series and I plan to keep a note of some interesting conversations between myself  (Baba) and my son (Birsa). He is growing fast and it is great experience.
This series was sparked by one unusual conversation.
I am one person who truly believes in Free market- even though i admit- my younger days first I was all for communism. The ideas of communism was very romantic for me. slowly I understood the fallacies of that line of thought and moved over to socialism. I still believe that socialism has good to offer but free market with human touch is required for world's growth. the same thought process overflows my ideas and i was lecturing Amrita- about benefits of free market and why she needs to be financially more literate. that the idea of earning money is not bad and money is important.

Birsa was listening and suddenly commented. Baba- Money is not everything.. and stop lecturing mumma. I was stunned. I asked why he thinks so and was bowled over by his explanation.
He said- Money is not everything as it cannot buy happiness all the time. Happiness can be got from some luxuries but mostly by being with mumma and baba. very simple but straight forward.
I had to beat a hasty retreat and explain that yes- money cannot buy happiness but it is important to make it nevertheless.

There was a deep meaning and lesson in this.

Birsa-- like any 9 year old amazes me-- the exposure they have, the deep sense and awareness. another very funny thing that i absolutely love is his changing ambitions.
For long- when he started to understand professions-- he was definite that he will become a doctor. I think because he adores his grandfathers ( both his maternal and paternal Grandfather are reputed doctors). Then one fine day- he decided that he needs to be a Car designer....and in a year it changed to Car designer plus mechanic !!! Then he graduated to being Astronaut. This i feel got inspired by multiple rocket & satellite launches  which I follow very keenly ( my customer success stories).But after he saw 2 astronaut falling from sky... He got really bothered about the safety aspect of it. He declared one morning.... He will study and be astronomer... Desk job for him. Astronaut job looks bit risky. No amount of counselling dispelling the myths helped. However when he started reading more books, his ambition became to be author. And he is determined that he will be such a good one that he will be having a special illustrator specific for his books. As of now we are stuck with a budding author who specializes in historical fiction and lots of fighting....Watch for more here. Amen.

Digital wave is sweeping us all

Six to seven years back- when Amazon used to suggest me what to buy even before I have clicked through the options- it sued to amaze me. Then somewhere down the line- the ads which used to suggest the most appropriate flights when I have just been thinking of going to meet Ma in kolkata or giving me suggestions of gifts in august or in November- i took these intelligent suggestions as some kind of granted magic. Slowly understood all these are part of digital wave. This is the new era of digital transformation. Whether it is ask avnet chat bot( which learns overtime- which microcontroller to suggest the customer, or what parts or articles they may like to read) or the exact song that youtube somehow managed to understand-- i need it is all part of it.
Best is- Google maps- or google assistant- understands what I am going to do or where i want to go. Effect to me as a sales guy was- when claiming for travel bills or for  car kms. Earleir- we used to have distance chart- office to customer- 16.5 kms, home to xyz supplier office- 12km. Now no need. just go to that date and see the exact km. It even asks you politely- were you there? and if you have taken photo- it shows a thumbnail of it. so cute. Basically you are identified with your email and phone number- and entire world is under convenience role.
Approximately 2 years back- my company which is traditional 95 years old- also moved to similar transformation and the results are encouraging. the adoption of digital tools- helps in increased productivity, better customer support.
But all the conveniences are for people who are honest and good. If you are being naughty- ok.... you will be exposed. For example- one of my teammate- youtube suggestions are all ... ok in mild words- erotic. and he was embrassed- when he had to open a content in front of me and the suggested  next clip was- " jawani ka hawas".. what fun in pulling his leg. He argued that all digital intelligence is eroding privacy.
I countered telling him- my suggestions are all nice and warm-- all old hindi movie love songs or motivational songs or new army/airforce videos. My wife's feeds is full of histry of empires, biology and cars ( ok!!! that one because of Birsa).
Digital transformation or revolution is sweeping us and people are trying to hide behind the curtain of privacy. on one hand you have no qualms in sharing your picture or check in when you are going from one airport to other...as if....
But that same person will lecture why AAdhar and google infringes his private private life.
So Privacy is real concern but it is your freedom - how you want to conduct your life. It will all be recorded and no point in cribbing about it. If you are a good citizen, good guy fundamentally- nothing to fear-- rather enjoy the benefits of digital revolution.
We are in interesting confluence of life- We have to concentrate on AI, VR, ML and Data analytics- main components of digital revolution. My next year goal is to be more knowledgeable about these and win more customer projects on it.

Solving field problems- using key principles

Among all the training that I have gone through during my professional stint-- my favourite will always be DDI training. Among various modules- the most important one is Communicating for leadership success or a.k.a communicating with impact. I have tried imbibing it in my personal life and have seen huge benefits. It talks about key principles and how you can use it to meet personal needs of the person you are interacting with. 5 of the principles are- Esteem, Empathy, Involvement, Share and support.

In very brief- for every interaction- we need to maintain or enhance self esteem.Many a times- people will get stuck- then maintain the esteem- if good accomplishments- then enhance it.Listen and respond with empathy--- in many a sales situation- this is the most important one.I was under firing line of a customer- who was comparing 2 leadership style- one who does not pick his call and another who even if busy- sends a message stating that he will call back. In most of the sales situation- when we are down and out- the simple reaction is flight.. donot pick that call and go for tough talks. I believe that is sheer disservice and disrespect. However difficult the situation may be- we have to talk and practice empathy. Short lead time order- complete order screw-up, ego being trampled by colleague in earlier interaction-- all and i repeat all can be solved by this practice.
3rd one- also can solve many sales oblong situation- ask for help and encourage involvement.. to build trust we can use sharing of thoughts, feelings and rationale ( where you need to!!). and final one is provide support but without removing responsibility. This type of support helps to build ownership.

I plan to write more examples and real life- examples of sales- and how it was solved using key principles. Stay tuned.

Pathos behind waiting

तलाश ना जाने किसकी हैं इस आँखों को,
हासिल हैं बहुत कुछ......मगर तसल्ली फिर भी नहीं..
वो याद आये यूँ ही बहुत..
की लौट आएं सब सिलसिले...
वो ठंडी हवा, वो  गिरते पत्ते
और वो कितने सारे यादें।
There is always a poignancy behind every 'missing' thoughts. The abnormally usual days of last quarter of year. The same challenges all over again. But the days.. They never fail to leave behind the imprints on our mind.
In mind, in our dreams... Reaching early to this great iconic metro. One of the nicest and safest city of India. The quite breakfast ..All veg fare. Then to go to our work. Then having the privilege of having a silent walk in Elliot beach. Silent, but full of meanings. Half life time waiting for such things to happen. Like an unfinished love story.Small vignette of talks. Catching up on life. Urging self to move on.The lighthouse... So mysterious yet so dignified. The orange hue of sunset and then counting the stars. Common ground of likes and wonderment.The company par excellence which is tied but ever youthful mind.  The slow fresh breeze giving the awesome fizz of life.New meaning, and refreshed outlook for life. Which still amazes me... The graceful steps, the slow and engaging talks.Those beautiful gazes. Then a great dinner...Which is always a fantasy. Always awesome.Never thought of but always dreamed of. Next day again breakfast with sweet memories of fantastic time. And after a hard day in field... Somehow matching time and again great company at terminal. Then it is always ...The same feeling so much talked but still nothing said.
In actual... It was  all finally very mundane. Only in back of mind planning. Nothing concrete. Usual responsibilities overwhelm. The same type of rough meetings. The usual firefighting. Multiple meetings. Solving problems. One at a time.Motivating the field and then at end of day. Feel empty.. When you are tired to the boots, a little roaming around in the streets of vadapalani. The sarvana bhavan also does not attract the lonely person any more.Feeling lost in front of that restaurant.. About turn, get into shell. Same old routine of punishing self... As if to find out how much I can stretch. 3 am to 1130pm in same day. Have I forgotten the rigour??. Clearing all emails, presentations and the calls. You just close the eyes and float away. The hard work clears the cobweb of mind.The rush of memories overwhelm. Next day, half empty airport. The delayed flight. In different times I may have welcomed it, just to have more time.Observe people. Study fellow being..Nice hobby. Count them only 6 of them. How strange. No pending emails, no calls. Closest of people will be busy. You feel embrassed to talk or whatsapp. You understand.Withdraw.You suddenly feel like crying..And find the tear ducts have been empty long back.Hard cold facts, hard cold numbers. The quarterly numbers fog the mind. No time for self pity. It is how life is, no time for nurturing the soft side of mine. But Keep loving, keep living. And it repeats.....

Beyond Fear

Beyond Fear
Lies Victory;
It is not my queer
to ask- what lies beyond.
Only thing i know- I am here.
Not to ask-why I ventured there.
It is only a liar who says- he is not afraid.
I for one will admit-
it makes me sweat with fear,
it makes my heart pound faster,
it makes me question my sanity.
Still I prod forward...
It is only the sweet smell of victory that beckons...
Because beyond fear lies victory.

-- From the pages of an old diary.

We always perceive a situation as difficult or challenging. That creates fear- is it doable or not? What happens if I fail?
What happens if people reject me? what if everything goes wrong.
Actually sometimes and someday- everything is set up to pull you down. It often happens - I am not ready for a meeting, the numbers are low, I did work for the program but it did not come out as I expected. Now the test with fire- and you tend to pray. but then the interaction goes just fine. People come to middle path and give agreement. In retrospect- those anxious moments seems so funny.
This happens with many- before exam, before a particular work- a phobia sets in. But if you have put your heart and mind into it, really worked for it- the result does come out just fine.

Efforts will yield result and will help to tide over the anxious moments. When we focus not on what others will say and do it just for the work itself- the results will be in favour of us.

So we need to focus on the means.. the end will take care of itself. When you are really scared of something, in reality its actually works out to be very simple.
N.B:- This blog entry and previous one was triggered by two simple questions. Thanks for helping me ponder. Thanks for inspiration.

Finagle's law of dynamic negatives

Finagle's law of dynamic negatives ,a.k.a corollary of Murphy's law- "Anything that can go wrong, will—at the worst possible moment."

We are in rush-- in this world of instant gratification. There is no time to smell the flower, stop and wonder at the sunrise. See the beauty and marvel at this so precious life. and we get late.....
Typically we are not a nation of punctual personalities, but we try a lot.
I remember a time- when I was rushing to a business review meeting and due to one of my colleague- got late. not only that his car broke down. The meeting was scheduled @9am and we were stuck somewhere 500 mtrs from the building. It was Pune, the area an upmarket one, and we never expected delay-- lest we factored any of the mishaps. so we were 30 minutes late. The supplier boss- who was known for his punctuality told me- that we wasted 10 people 15 minutes and hence that is 150 minutes waste. further he calculated that as- worth $1M of business. The shameless avatar of mine got into overdrive- which smiled and accepted everything and proceeded with the business. the numbers were good, the results were good and focus was on what to do next and my delay was forgotten. After 3 weeks similar meeting was slated in Delhi and this time- he got in traffic and it was my turn to remind me that he got delayed 30 minutes and it cancels out the earlier debt. The ensuing  laughter was heard throughout the building.
But that veteran quoted Finagle's law of dynamic negatives.... Thanks Arun Sir...I will remain indebted to gurus like you forever.

Some time ago- one of my friend commented when in rush- and in traffic- the lateness is amplified. In full filmy style-- the statement was " Jab tum late hote ho, puri kayanath koshish karti hain tumhe aur late karane ki"... But Life goes on. when such things happen- we tend to do mistake. It is better to control our emotions and check for our sanity. Maid informs at last moment - not coming, kid says- this was required and now. all push and pull ... no time to breathe. but that is the time to smile. Because energy is contained by smile and positive vibes comes through. That positive vibes tends to rub of the nearby surroundings and accelerates the good things. when that happens- the zigsaw puzzle pieces just fall in place.
Next time when you are tensed being late and everything seems to be going against you. just take deep breath, smile at the adversity and walk on

By the way----- double corollary of --" Jab tum late hote ho, puri kayanath koshish karti hain tumhe aur late karane ki" is my favourite dialog of SRK-"Kehte hain agar kisi cheez ko agar dil se chaho to saari kayanath tumhe usse milane ki koshish me lag jaati hai"

so May be we just need to do things according to law of attraction and leave the rest to destiny.
We are never late in life...

Some waiting are forever

I get uncomfortable when people wait for me. Like if someone waiting for me in railway station, airport or bus station to receive me. I have been out of my home since very young age-- but every time when there was time to return- I used to tell my parents not to come. This behaviour continues to this date. Later- when there was more luxury at offer-I will not take those privileges(still I deny!!). But it is not true that I donot like it.... It is simple equation- that the love that you show when you wait to receive someone is very powerful.
Somehow it has got in my mind that - such unconditional love is not  for me. It is not possible for someone, who can love me so much. So why the prepension?However I take it on me to receive anyone and everyone. I love to go out of way to receive, make people comfortable and feel wanted.I have trained myself to love.. Love unconditional...And waiting for someone is manifestation of that love.
In my younger days when placing long distance calls was a huge chore-- you need to book 'Trunk calls'- it was my duty to wait near the phone. Calls will come from overseas for my parents or from different family members. I always used to sit with a pen and paper to note down points- lest i forget. But my heart was so much into it that seldom a point missed my memory.

But some waits are forever. The wait for recognition. The wait for that elusive yes. The waits have been purely personal or truly professional.. some waits have yielded nothing but pain. Some waits have given spectacular success.There is romanticism behind those waits. Then there is always a perennial type of wait. That sad and fatalistic type of wait.

I wait for peace.
I wait for love.
I will wait for next time..Phir kahin, phir kabhi...I will wait forever....
Let the wait be forever , be eternal and transcend time.....I know it is very hard to wait for something which you know might never happen; but it's even harder to give up when you know it's everything you want.

Songs in my mind and heart

I always had this recurring dream--- there is this large auditorium filled with hundreds of people and I am strumming my guitar and singing song ( written by self). I confined this dream to dustbin quite early in my childhood. During the mandatory music class in school- my teacher used to plead with me-- not to sing. I was that bad. Legend has that I once sang 'ye matire..' in front of school inspectors and they fell sick.
Out of tune, deep bass voice with no melody- that is what even my biggest supporter my ma says. But I always felt I sing beautifully with lots of love.
 I still think- where Mendel's Gene theory went wrong? maybe skipped 1 generation.Because both my parents sing very well. Amrita sings well- she was trained too. So Birsa has some chances - i Guess.

Not to be let down- I pushed myself to speak publicly and never leave an opportunity to speak. I love elocution, debates, turn-coat, extempore speeches and poetic recitations. I only wish I had more opportunities. Ok, this topic- more in separate entry- perhaps!!

Coming back to my interest in songs. I always loved songs, singing never happened, and subsequently I discovered I am equally horrible in dancing. It took Amrita 11 years of patience and more than 12 hours to coach me to dance with her publicly (Thanks to Chotu's wedding!!)- and I guess - I made so many mistakes of steps that she also has given up by now. sigh!!!
But I have never ever given up on singing.

The tunes come to me -- I love western classics, hollywood classics, old hindi songs ( romantic), bhajans, spiritual light music. Sometimes the tune will be embedded in my dreams or suddenly it will haunt me and the moment I get up or get opportunity- I need to hear that song. Youtube is a boon for people like me. Often I will remember 1 or 2 major words or lines- and can search to that song. Sometimes I will pester her with tunes that is roaming freely in my mind and try to sing it out. She says it is impossible, but she has her successes in deciphering too.Sometimes....
Then there are songs which remind me of people, incidents etc. Some songs are special and some are like anthems to me.
Beatles- Imagine, sun is fading away have the power to stop me..
Tu Chaiye, Suhana safar, chukar mere man ko, and so many more- act like taking a time machine.
then- Bailamos--- reminds me of success.
Now that there are apps-- it has become so convenient for me ( 300 + top liked songs, after lots of thoughts/ removing/adding). More so-- my new car can stream using Bluetooth, usb and from online too. That is one feature- which has made my commute and travelling around in Bangalore in traffic so much more bearable. I have now made lists and can quickly jump to them- travel songs (while in airports, flights, trains, buses- long distance), commute time songs, morning prayer songs, etc... When the songs are very nice and I want to share- youtube allows me to share. The feeling is so nice when that shared song plays again and again.

That's it- I have decided that when I am no more- and if they ever hold a memory meeting- noone will be remorseful or sad that day. no, not allowed. They can listen to the songs that i love and smile and feel happy.

Alone in the crowd

The article in The Hindu reminded that 28th Sept was 130th birth anniversary of T.S. Eliot. And that made me revisit the poems- also the quote from four quartets- jogged my memory a bit....

"I said to my soul, be still, and wait without hope

For hope would be hope for the wrong thing; wait without love,
For love would be love of the wrong thing; there is yet faith
But the faith and the love and the hope are all in the waiting."

After a hectic work week- when I had multiple meetings and little bit more than what is normal-- of my share of having running nose and sneezing-- I was forced to reflect.

How true--- the love and the hope- all are in waiting. You keep doing what you do. Keep laughing loudly, keep encouraging others, keep motivating , keep inspiring but then-- for a moment- when you close your eyes and need all of them to come back to you-- you feel that familiar anxiety. That anxiety of being loner.Somewhere that helpless feeling of being very lonely.

You love, you engage-- passionately. You sing the songs, listen to the raindrops at night and suddenly feel very lonely. You cannot describe-- what you want.

The tempest around you blows off, the splashing road by the car- ceases.....You start sharing then give up...thinking it is of not much importance.

It is important for me to speak, to tell-- my innermost fears- the dark and not so dark side of my story, but there is no caring soul to be bothered.

Why should anyone bother?

The feeling haunts---finally I am not that important. All actions are just coming out of my sense of duty. My duty as a son, husband, father, friend, leader....

The meetings draw on and on-- you keep giving enthusiastic inputs. some will be taken up, most will not be.

The forwards and chats- keep happening... some write one word.. i reply in multiple paragraphs. Some have to just indicate.. and I will be all over.. helping, talking...laughing, smiling.

But then the behaviour will not be replicated.

Then it is like- you sit in room full of crowd and you are still lonely.You command your presence, push the agenda forward, but then you are lonely.  After a while you return to your book, share the notes, but then find around you-- everyone fixated at screens or fixated with themselves. That is the point when you feel the fun. You can get away from all that and not a single soul will miss you. you feel not important. It is too much of give and take in every interactions.

Then I feel- I stop.... maybe it is too much enthusiasm, too much love for life. Let me be alone .. so what.. we are en consed in crowd. The murmur becomes shouting and then you raise a point and people suddenly look at you. The pointer was always there.. then you feel half of the room was feeling why they didnot propose the same. You smile inside. You weep in private. then you decide... no more I will take myself so seriously.

You keep waiting in crowd--- lonely and tired... hoping for love and hope..

Sense of loss and avoiding the tailspin effect

His glassy eyes-- told me the story so vividly. I knew the tempest inside his heart. I knew that he had taken a brave decision. I wanted to hug him and tell him it will be ok. Someone alerted me already- what he may be going through.
 But , waited... till he can tell it by himself. A test again that i do for my fellow soldiers-- am i correct in judging this young man to be a great individual. And I was not wrong....
While returning from the visit- in auto- over the din of Bangalore traffic- he finally told--" Sambit, I have decided to call off my wedding".I allowed him to explain the background. All the while I was actually feeling myself in his shoes. The years of rejections, losses, things which should not happened but happened-- flashed. Just wanted to tell him-- It is ok. Time will heal you, brother. But I did tell him- how incredibly proud i am of him.. of him maintaining the composure and taking it in the chin. Principles first. but then the loss is their.
Rejections and losses.
Another very close friend told me about crying all night because of loss of a close relation.I felt deeply, no amount of love was enough, no words were kind enough. No solace big enough.

 2 different end of spectrum. But personal losses nevertheless.You cannot clarify, you cannot judge. You cannot answer why ?
Dealing with loss- one easy way is to take refuge in some of the excellent books. I have always referred to Bhagwad Gita, Tuesdays with morrie and The last lecture for solace during personal loss.
In truth- we all know Death is inevitable but we want to stretch.. we donot want to believe. The day we are able to stare death at the eye and say-- it is time. i am afraid no more.. the doubts will melt. if it is time... then it is time to go. It is very simple. But we question.. why?

When it is loss or rejection-- for no fault of ours- we again question-- why me? There are increasing cases of depression and young kids-- thinking it to be a disease. All they have to do is think out and talk. Surround yourself with people who are positive, who really care about you. typically they maynot be the first one to like your fb post or IG post but will speak up or stand up for you always. If you have good mentor, good teachers, good friends- then the work of tackling the loss is easier.

It is good to cry, good to grieve, Good to say i donot know , good to feel the pain. But then we have to channelise- the pain and loss.

Visualise oneself to overcome that pain, now that it has happened-- what next? what is the next best possible thing. if you visualise that next best thing- you will get there. always happens.

Bye , Bye- KA03-MH9443

I never thought I will ever be so attached with an inanimate object. But then when I was getting into my car of 10 years 9months for a last ride- from office to home-- I decided to click the picture of the old lady. sometime in November-2007- good freind Sanket- literally shook me out of my famous non decisive mode and we bought this car. Color- Beige was Amrita's choice. Uncharacteristic of myself- I did not do any research also. Just went and found which one is within my budget and bought. Later people told-- ohhh , you bought a very poor model. It was Estillo LXI. Very rugged, very convenient for Bangalore roads and very very lucky for us. I remember- it used to be parked outside our rented house in Thippasandra. And one fine morning- Amrita found out to her horror that someone has dented the front fender. She was so upset. She cried and cried so much that I had to take her for a softie to a nearby icecream shop. I was very rough driver, and Amrita will always be gentle on it. The car saw all our adventures together. Never went on very long drive, but it was part of us. Numerous incidents are associated with it. So many pleasure trips within Bangalore. Birsa loved it...We three colleagues shared our commute- self, Panda ji, milind.Panda ji also had the same car but pink one. We used to call our $90M car -- a sum of  business- that we 3 were responsible for that times. Today-- if we calculate the business we are responsible for is just double. The same car- I remember- during sometime in 2010- I had the audacity of taking 3 Apex members from our office to TI office. Jane Neo, our sr. VP Marcom and materials found the car very cute. Terence, our Regional President- said nice car and Andy wong said- very comfortable car. I had a mouthful from colleagues about my audacity and behaviour. Later I had so many customer visits in it-- all over. So many memories created by this small car. Ferrying friends and family. I smile when i remember some famous quotes. Ramani once told- your car makes a noise like aircraft, but that meeting was super success.  so today when for last time it was on the ramp--- i felt like saying thank you!! From that same designated slot .. with full confidence I have gone ahead.. always to Win.
May someone- equally lucky get you. Good bye KA03-MH9443. You served me well. Amrita will only be able to welcome the new car, Could not say bye to the old lady.

Learn, Share, Lead & Inspire- My 4 steps

Learn-
That is first step for a field person. specially if you are a technical field sales person or techno-commercial guy!!! Everyday is a process of learning and unlearning.Rather we have to unlearn and be in receptive mode to learn. Each encounter, each customer visit, each interaction is a great learning experience. When i get too much mired into daily work- i spice it up. I focus myself to know what am i learning from what i am into. that is sure indicator for me to spur myself up. Even if I am into a very boring meeting ( you can't avoid them, despite doing homework and trying to excuse yourself from many of them)- I try to get myself- into learn mode. Learning mode is something that takes me forward. Reading books has been my habit. I like reading anything and everything ( even the contents of shampoo bottle!!). Reading gives me insight. In last one decade the content has just exploded , thanks to wide reach of WWW. This has been boon for me. so much content, so much to read. But we need to be cautious- sometimes- it is huge time waste- if you just see non value add content. Always curate the social media, the medium to throw up links or genre of your choice.

Share-
Even though learning is continuous- we need to share it with others. Hinduism has always told share the knowledge, if you share it - it grows. In modern times-- I find when you share- people may like , may not like. Some will reject you, people have less time, less patience. We are slowing forgetting how to read, how to think, how to converse meaningfully. In many meetings- I find the attention span is less. So I try to share my main value /message in first 15 seconds.. at the most 2 minutes- after that people are back to their mobile.It is becoming acceptable practice for people to be physically present but not focused. But share we must!!
Sharing of knowledge is important. sometimes- you may be deemed preachy, people will laugh at your back, but keep sharing. Life is very short , when related to the vastness of cosmic timelines. Funny... my colleagues once gave me a cup " Baba ramdev award"--- citing this sharing philosophy of mine. and once more--- another cup" wikipedia award". So even if that happens.. that's it...

I also feel- we should share our wealth. you may be millionaire, you may be billionaire, you may be salaried-- with hand to mouth existence. but there is always some unfortunate people around. Share your wealth. This is subject to practice. Numerous excuses will rise, best i found is- put an ECS of xyz amount to 1 or 2 charity. It works. what you give, comes back many fold.
You will occasionally be cheated, many times taken advantage of. you will feel it also- but still donot forget to give.

Lead-
Leaders are made . you can make yourself a leader. you may not have people to lead, no direct influence, may be the bottom rung official, may be just the ordinary joe. But you can still lead. there are ways and means.First find out what you believe in- then implement. That will help to lead. Influence people by following BAP principle...Hmm. what is BAP principle ( ok- let me see.. if you are interested- get in touch with me. )It is powerful technique of influencing people.

Inspire-
Finally Keep inspiring people. first be positive. Keep giving positive vibes around you. Do good to others. Keep Inspiring till the last breath.

Notes for Self Improvement-3- unnecessary lies

This one trait- also i hate. I lie...
I lie to do good.
I lie to save someone.
I lie to do many things as a sales person.
I make stories.
Many times- on hindsight it was not required.

But not for self profit.. in most cases. and that is strange. I have done mistakes and got punished. Not a single time- when i lied for my benefit- i actually got anything. so that is big solace.
Leni deni .. bhul chook.

but at this juncture- when i think I have another 2nd half to tread through- i need to improve.
I have fought with myself and have reduced this.. but still i can make it perfect...
Way to go.

Notes for Self improvement-2- Avoid Procrastination

If there was ever a gift from God- I will like to ask for the ability to get over my habit of procrastination. I am so self aware and ashamed of this particular trait of mine. This is no.1 enemy of my growth. In pursuit of excellence i have always stumbled on this rock of procrastination again and again.
Earliest memory- reminds me of instance when I delayed giving my name for that debate competition. Was denied entry ... and forced to listen. I was kicking myself- the field was weaker than expected and I could have got that coveted trophy. Next year was too late- the competition was stronger and i could barely manage a 3rd prize. shame was- I did not try...

so many instances flood me right now.. that delayed SSB practice, that delayed decision to pursue my course in engineering (but that had a positive aspect, a consolation-- the friends i got were sublime).. but all of them give a feeling was it destiny or missed chances?

One procrastination I can never forget till I go to grave...  why I was not bold enough? why I put off expressing myself fully ?  was i too young to go further? a step further. agreed it was one sided.. but never asked at that time. left it for providence and a foolish concept of next time?

Each stage of my life- I have been hounded by this fallacy of mine. and my soulmate came to my rescue. She gently pushes, nudges and prods... never nags. Gives me time to reflect. Gives me pro- and cons. that works. Thanks BB... I may not have reached this much also- without that.

Keep reminding me...

and  my soulmate of providence-- you promised to make me better. I know there is next time.. keep motivating me.

Notes for self improvement-1- Practice Humility

Another sales win, another design win and it is always that feeling- " I am master of all that i survey". Then the kid inside myself feel elated and the feeling comes" I can win anything and everything"... Then the natural bragging comes to me.

But wait....Is it that important? and for what I am elated..??
Then the way back- that urge... I must listen to the song.....Don't get me wrong. the urge is so strong I stop on the side of road- and search for the song in youtube-
 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HDbuSOI1Vnc ( E monihar amay nahi saje) .. The cobwebs of the mind gets cleared.
Gitabitan- states that Poet wrote this when he was going through conflict between feeling of achievement and rejection of situation when he was being praised from all corners prior to receiving the Nobel prize. I think no other song could have captured my mood so well.

This jewell-studded chain is not match for me.
It hurts when put on; it clatters while attempting to break.
It suffocates, choking my vocal tune
It is distracting and I am unable to concentrate.
That is the reason why I am on the wait,
I wish to put the chain across your neck and be relieved.
Gracefully receive me with floral garlands
I shy away from you because of this jewel-chain.

Can I practice humility? more?
that i have to- sometimes when in thick of battle, when i feel elated- i just have to remind me- everything is transient. there have been more failures than success. I have done more mistakes than correct things at one go.some mistakes- I could learn from, some mistakes -- i continue to do.. so what is there to be proud of.

I have to be more humble. Enforce it.. Humbleness brings peace.
I have to remind myself everyday- to be humble.. while still pursuing perfection.

The glistening dewdrop

The translated lines of a famous poem by the great bard- Ravindranath tagore-

"I traveled miles, for many a year,
I spent a lot in lands afar,
I’ve gone to see the mountains,
The oceans I’ve been to view.
But I haven’t seen with these eyes
Just two steps from my home lies
On a corn of paddy grain,
A glistening drop of dew."

(Copied from the blog of Mr. Rajib roy)-

On an usual lonely evening- after a hard day's work , when emails just get replied, and still i say to myself- two more presentations to prepare...and these lines get to me. Does it happen to you too? some old lines of favourite poem, some half forgotten lines of old song and you feel .. maybe.. maybe.. it should linger.

It happens with me, these feelings actually keep me sane. It is odd- for a sales person to have lonely time. but yes, it happens to the one- who just keeps his head inside the work and life. I realised today- there is no need to be worried too much about one's own self. You are not that important.

Means- you, me.. nahh. not important atall. we are all so self centred that we have lost the ability to care for others. The precious life is entwined in linkedin, facebook, whatsapp and what not? we are very much into ourself.. so much that we have forgotten to care for others. so that gave me an idea. who care what i think or feel for? who cares a damn.

But maybe I care for--that long abstract shadow-- which i can see of the tall tower all over the okhla phase1. imaging itself on the glistening rainwater -- drizzling and the fading sounds of traffic from the 8th floor. Beautiful moon beckons life from yonder and i wonder--- what is the real meaning of life. the life is full of giving, if I donot - then it is fallacy. Now what will others think?

Then it comes to me like a bolt- I am not that important that someone will care for me. that gave me lot of comfort. The feeling that it does not matter anymore to be correct and proper as long as I have the heart and will to continue doing good for others. without malice, without expectations.  so many things to be done, so many things remain unexplored. then that shadow playing of cloud and moon made me remember the poem...."glistening drop of dew" Ekti sishir bindu....

Is it really necessary that people will see eye to an eye. may be most of the time no. but that does not mean that we stop caring, that we stop loving, or stop doing what we are supposed to do. Onwards always onwards.

when deep love and longing make you feel very important. .... it is prudent to remember- it does not matter much.

Because if you haven't felt your heart and soul being torn apart , then you haven't really loved with all your heart.

So continue loving... life will take care of itself.

continue doing good for others.

I resolve to continue learning and inspiring...

Why I chose sales as my profession?

It is 18years as a sales person for me. 18th August,2000- the day I first did a field visit as a sales person. The customer was Tata elxsi. I just remember - it was to pitch for training services of Bitmapper and that it was Friday. I remember- I was sweating and to make matters worse I wore a tie (the Tie was borrowed from Praveen??).

 I was completely a misfit among a crowd practising casual dressing. I remember the long bus journey from Majestic to Whitefield.
After so many years- I wanted to deal with this question.
Because it was really very difficult for a shy , timid and very introvert kid to take this leap of faith and join the ranks of Alpha males getting their bread from World's second oldest profession.
Today I think I need to do a self evaluation and answer this myself. It was same like the other questions of my life... I was afraid of water- so i learnt swimming , I was afraid of heights (still i get sweat if i have to climb stairs to fix something!!)- and i learnt to love mountains.
I have no hesitation to admit now that like many sales pro- i also joined the rank without ever aspiring to be a sales person. I have heard many kids telling that he wants to be doctor, engineer, scientist, but to think of it noone ever aspires to be sales person. no not even progeny of sales people. Also have you ever noticed--- many few people ever introduce themselves as sales people. But this was one profession which has given so much to so many people. The circumstances were tough for me in year2000. I was average student and there was nothing remarkable to showcase. yes- i did got trained well in technology and got through first stage of many companies which was recruiting en-masse. I kept a count... I attended 28 interviews (Was politely rejected in most. I got into final stage for only 5, but those 5 -gave me enormous confidence).Mehta sir- allowed me to work first and the JD was fuzzy, but i understood I have to do some sales. I was good in doing hard work- so it was not difficult for me to call upon more than 8 customers in single day.. which was routine for me each day and everyday. the training was very hands on... much to the credit of Rakesh Mehta sir-- who taught me literally how to understand that spark in customer's eyes. Lot of help from Naga sir-- our distributor. He made me part of his family. and then i started falling in love with the work. It was addictive and gave enormous kick. It also helped me to forget all the rejections. It was fun- it was ecstasy. I used to be very apprehensive in making friends- i found i can always have a kind of 2 persona. On a typical work day- i can talk with anyone, make friendship under 10 seconds, influence anyone, win anything. It made me forget all my past failures, It made me forget all my pain. I always had the curious mind of explorer-- and i could take up any kind of discomfort. So the nigh bus travels-- long bus travels- 8 hrs, 10 hrs, 24 hrs, long train travels- with multiple hops. They helped me become strong mentally. By Jan 2001- I was completely taken. The first order- 2.5lacs....ohhh.. i went wild with joy. The PO copy in hand, i remember going to that malabar tiffin room ( it was unaffordable for me most days)- and i ordered soup and gobi manchurian. and celebrated- me, my po copy and gobi manchurian. Then slept peacefully .. same room (Rs110/per night)- Renuka lodge.

Then the years rolled by- in form of Quarters and success.the territory- which started with Pune region, then south Maharastra, became Goa, then Tamilnadu, Kerala. finally Bangalore & Karnataka. When i moved to coreel- i had visited each nook and corner of maharastra, Goa, Kerala, Tamilnadu and Karnataka. Hyderabad was always lucky for me... It just rocketed me up and further. some time in 2007- I started having national roles. more cities.  It was always a forward thurst. so it will not be wrong to say--- the profession chose me. and yes, i did the right thing.

An Interview in bis infotech online.

SOC design- in future .
Was trying to search my other articles in EFY and other older journals. This one is most recent- on soc design- link above. Rest I will put up for own reference.. later.

Edit-1-
got this old one-EFY- Memory article
 or copy paste- in browser-
https://electronicsforu.com/electronics-projects/electronics-design-guides/know-designing-memory-embedded-systems/2

Edit -2-
Another article came up in BIS infotech-Feb12-
https://www.bisinfotech.com/electronics-article/how-far-exactly-can-an-electric-vehicle-ev-travel/

Growing with our old friend, the customer (An excerpt )

There was an internal request in my company-- that I write on topic- 'what's on my mind?'
I ended up writing a piece on customer support. After writing- I felt it was very preachy.
Some colleagues took trouble and time to good comments. I am still doubtful about the quality- but before i lose it ( like i have lost my other poems, short stories, and essays!!- let me try to preserve from now on). Thanks to Hannah for helping to edit and my Amrita to say as always ' bhaloi hoeche!!' (Bengali-- 'it is nice').

Thanks always to my organisation for letting me flourish in so many ways. Avnet is truly a great place to work. So here I go--- ================================================================================================================================================ It was a mildly hot May afternoon as I pulled up in my car to a customer’s premises. I signed my name in the visitor registry (while taking a glance at who had called recently) and exchanged a few pleasantries with the receptionist. Both actions assured me that the other guys had still not called, and perhaps were not yet aware of the opportunity.

 Good for me. Bad for them.

 I then sat in that familiar sofa and even after so many years in the field – the familiar adrenaline rush. Am I prepared? Did I miss something while doing my homework? Quickly revisiting in my mind the pending (and burning) issues and my main point – I kept thinking, can I ask for that next step for that new project? Or will the fire-fighting issues take over? In due time, I was in front of the technical director and new product manager. The meeting was scheduled for 30 minutes, but after an hour and a half, we reached an impressive conclusion: eight action points, two great words of appreciation and yes, the “go ahead” for the next project. The customer agreed to work on all four proposals that my team gave the previous week.
 Success! Small, but significant.
I am sure the above scenario is very familiar with most field representatives. It’s the same routine which keeps people like me looking forward to jumping out of bed and just doing it. Each day when I wake up with a plan in my mind, it is for our customers. Each day is different and comes with so many problems to solve. One customer at a time, one supplier at a time.
 It has been 12 years and counting in the field for me representing Avnet India. I began as a key account manager in Sales. From there, it was on to serving as a product manager for two key line cards before working as an FAE manager for the past few years. I feel privileged that I work for a company which has given me an opportunity to exceed the budgets and expectations in different roles. I doubt any other job can give me the satisfaction of working like a business owner, as a leader with ample scopes to make a difference to society. Customers and suppliers always ask me about our transformation. They ask whether they will see better turn-around timed, more technical support, more effective solutions. Suppliers ask if we will bring more value than the others. With a smile, we answer them, “Yes!” We then effectively demonstrate it again and again. Avnet is the true bridge between different technology providers and innovators. A true-blue Avnet field representative must balance both. Both are very important for us because, in crude terms, “customers give us resale, while suppliers give us the margin.” The customer, however, is the most important piece in this entire journey. It gets very cloudy when it comes to execution in real-time. Often there are days when we are challenged by suppliers to push a particular product at a particular price. Project timelines are often very fuzzy and it can be very easy to forget the basics. Being in a high-tech world, many projects do not realise their full potential. We all need help during those times and the beautiful teamwork at Avnet helps us through them.

 Here are a few practices which have helped myself and my team keep the basics in focus daily:

 1) Be responsible and responsive :-
Customers are loyal to us (even in our typical B2B business environment) because we own the project and problems. Proactive calling, informing and responding helps a lot. There will be many problems, delays in samples (stuck in some documentation), longer than expected lead times, price errors, delayed order loading and AR issues. But, all these issues can be resolved and we should own up and tell them the what and why of it. It may not be good news every time, but we must tell them fast.

 2) Ask for referrals:-
  Customer contacts are for life. Nurturing key relationships is very important. If we bring value to customers, I see them coming back to us even when their roles or responsibilities change. It is always easier to get incremental business when we apply ourselves and do our jobs with a lot of love and passion.

 3) Always advocate for our customers:-
 When we advocate for our customers and get them the best possible solutions – whether it’s the most economical choice of components, a better way of doing things, or a new lead – they become ours for the long-term. This is the simplest technique and we should use it more often. Last year, when we faced a sudden drop in revenue due to a few suppliers taking different paths, I found many customers supporting us. When we told them we couldn’t further service these parts, customers asked what can we offer instead? And, can we help them change in new projects? Many new customers, such as independent design houses, love to work with Avnet because we help them when it matters most.

 4) Respect competition but leverage their weakness:-
  I personally feel that when fear and mindless negativity gets to us, it is stronger competition than any one of them out there. Some other electronic component distributers may have better services, better prices, or a better sales system, but none have it all. In each customer situation, we must find their weaknesses. When we find it, we should be quick to leverage them. It is always sweet to win, but when we lose we cannot go into excuse mode. Instead, we must quickly learn from the mistakes and make sure not to repeat them.
 We at Avnet India pride ourselves that for 23 years Avnet has been number one in our region. We recognise that our success is due to our customers, as well as our supplier partners. We have grown with our old friend – the customer – because our success is mutual.

To bare my soul-- Shall I try again?

Seven years went by like a fast paced river. This blog was forgotten, the website that i created-- long lost.I think the responsibilities weighed me down- and i forgot that I could create something other than some reports or good product presentations. Then on this Tuesday on Independence day eve, something very strange happened. It was again a midnight travel spree- relaxed mind with a new book in hand. The book 'footprints on the rocks' was awesome , I was hooked. Nowadays there are so many distractions of social media that focusing solely on feeding your soul is a chore.Thinking has become a luxury.But somehow a very charming, fuzzy & lovely interaction triggered it.
 I remembered my blog... Most of the writings- are personal notes on the flow of my life. Very short but full of truth. I know it is not important. Beauty of this format is- hardly it will get to be read by anyone- unless I point it to someone. Unlike what i write in facebook, IG or Whatsapp.So it will be easier for me to note down again. Does it matter? I donot think so-- who bothers whether there is one more star or nebula in this vast universe. The data explosion is so much that some random notes of mine will be again lost in time wrap of 1 & 0. But I promised myself- I will start writing again. The flow of words were halting, timid - just like small steps of the kid who left the small town and found everything wondrous in big city. The thoughts which were jumbled then became the words- in process- as if the sales pro has taken over that kid's soul. That kid is still alive, still the hopeless romantic, still the same procrastination plague his every decisions. But somewhere down the full flow of life- which is very exciting- he still likes to inspire, still wants to do good. Hoping that I will be honest and be able to bare my soul again. I hope I will be able to write a full fledged observation on life as it happens.