Sunday, September 05, 2010
Responsibility comes along with laurels
I like the joke of one of my seniors in semicon industry. 'good things never go unpunished'. I always sincerely beleive that in my profession- you are as good as your last quarter. similarly- when going gets good- i never get too much excited- as whatever goes up- comes donw. ans so i get restless.Two years of hard work--- and chandran's words on oct 2007 became prophetic. I love this experienced colleague of mine- always bang on target and prediction. 2 years and 2 changes in roles- last one being very prestigoious and comes with lots of expectations. my compnay always has been very good to me. It is meritrocracy always- you work hard- you get the goods. You donot do hard work- you donot get the goods but get upteen no. of chances to change the course and excel.this is what i love about my job- learn and unlearn-- win always.Now i am entering a new phase- with lots of hope, and wishes, lots of plans and lots fo misgivings. but i am very sure- about one thing- i will work harder and will try the hardest. I have never been the person who worries about the ends. the means are important. it is always good to fight and then lose than never have fought atall ( sorry tennyson-- that's a sad but apt parody of your line)
To my elder brother....an ode
Dear ....
I promised to self that one day i will write this.And you will know that ( as always-- the connection was and is very strong). We have been freinds, and we have been there and seen all.I first recollect from my early memories- you were the hero. Extremely talented, and somebody whom all look upto- whom all loved and liked. One who cannot fail.Over the years- tried to follow you. Remember the numerous stories we shared-- both of us being voracious readers. You used to tell me all classics and later i used to re-read them. i used to make up some stories- mix of various stories and you also sometimes liked them.on this day of anoteh teacher's day-- a certain wistfullness took over me. woke up at ungodly hour-- kissed my son- who gave me his sincere smile ( half asleep).Then i thought about all teachers, all freinds and then i thought about you. Years and years between us- we never spoke. There was these incidents- which i wanted not be part of- which deeply hurt me. later realised-To forget and forgive is only way out. has not been there the demons in my life too? those innumerable failures, innumerable professional and personal mistakes. did i throw myself out? nay... always came over them and excelled.so it's time to catch up. today when i see your hobby photographs- they are much more beautiful than your paintings. those paintings which i used to admire and begged you to teach me. Realised- excellence is not taught-- it is practicsed. You told the same.I remember- how tolerant you were of me- when- you being the elder had to wait- till i finished my long drawn lunch. We grew up- each summer- we used to meet and catch up- hours and hours of talk.then you became a doctor.Our paths diverged. i remember- missing you on some of my worst days of my life. i remmeber that sales call - i was in chandigarh- and i knew you were a student there-- but professionalism called for no time to meet my most precious brother.Second time- i could not stop- i just called you-- you were somewhere outside. I remember-- I planned and took all my leaves at one go ( taking 10 leaves at one go- when you are a junior sales person-- is something amazing-- and very courageous thing to do) and went dibrugarh for your marriage. then i remember the time- when i was shocked by all unpleasant news.It all came crashing down. won't tell a lie- it was a big let down for me. i tried to reason with my own self--' everybody is supposed to make mistake', 'maybe i donot know enough'.'maybe- it is a bad dream'. but mind overruled heart and those ties snapped. Whenever i go to Mumbai, it is usually in a car of colleague or a bus ( earlier it used to be the red busses and nowadays swanky volvo .. how times change :-) )-- there are some small stops- i keep myself awake and let myself think....( you know hypothysing, if it was like this and that types).. all those places are linked to some persons-- cbd belapur, vashi, anusakti nagar/chembur,iit-powai,andheri...
They remind of friends and collegues and incidents-- mostly pleasant. so, till we meet again, good bye and good luck. but remmeber- I never went away- when we did not talk-- I only thought and kept my silence.
I promised to self that one day i will write this.And you will know that ( as always-- the connection was and is very strong). We have been freinds, and we have been there and seen all.I first recollect from my early memories- you were the hero. Extremely talented, and somebody whom all look upto- whom all loved and liked. One who cannot fail.Over the years- tried to follow you. Remember the numerous stories we shared-- both of us being voracious readers. You used to tell me all classics and later i used to re-read them. i used to make up some stories- mix of various stories and you also sometimes liked them.on this day of anoteh teacher's day-- a certain wistfullness took over me. woke up at ungodly hour-- kissed my son- who gave me his sincere smile ( half asleep).Then i thought about all teachers, all freinds and then i thought about you. Years and years between us- we never spoke. There was these incidents- which i wanted not be part of- which deeply hurt me. later realised-To forget and forgive is only way out. has not been there the demons in my life too? those innumerable failures, innumerable professional and personal mistakes. did i throw myself out? nay... always came over them and excelled.so it's time to catch up. today when i see your hobby photographs- they are much more beautiful than your paintings. those paintings which i used to admire and begged you to teach me. Realised- excellence is not taught-- it is practicsed. You told the same.I remember- how tolerant you were of me- when- you being the elder had to wait- till i finished my long drawn lunch. We grew up- each summer- we used to meet and catch up- hours and hours of talk.then you became a doctor.Our paths diverged. i remember- missing you on some of my worst days of my life. i remmeber that sales call - i was in chandigarh- and i knew you were a student there-- but professionalism called for no time to meet my most precious brother.Second time- i could not stop- i just called you-- you were somewhere outside. I remember-- I planned and took all my leaves at one go ( taking 10 leaves at one go- when you are a junior sales person-- is something amazing-- and very courageous thing to do) and went dibrugarh for your marriage. then i remember the time- when i was shocked by all unpleasant news.It all came crashing down. won't tell a lie- it was a big let down for me. i tried to reason with my own self--' everybody is supposed to make mistake', 'maybe i donot know enough'.'maybe- it is a bad dream'. but mind overruled heart and those ties snapped. Whenever i go to Mumbai, it is usually in a car of colleague or a bus ( earlier it used to be the red busses and nowadays swanky volvo .. how times change :-) )-- there are some small stops- i keep myself awake and let myself think....( you know hypothysing, if it was like this and that types).. all those places are linked to some persons-- cbd belapur, vashi, anusakti nagar/chembur,iit-powai,andheri...
They remind of friends and collegues and incidents-- mostly pleasant. so, till we meet again, good bye and good luck. but remmeber- I never went away- when we did not talk-- I only thought and kept my silence.
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