His glassy eyes-- told me the story so vividly. I knew the tempest inside his heart. I knew that he had taken a brave decision. I wanted to hug him and tell him it will be ok. Someone alerted me already- what he may be going through.
But , waited... till he can tell it by himself. A test again that i do for my fellow soldiers-- am i correct in judging this young man to be a great individual. And I was not wrong....
While returning from the visit- in auto- over the din of Bangalore traffic- he finally told--" Sambit, I have decided to call off my wedding".I allowed him to explain the background. All the while I was actually feeling myself in his shoes. The years of rejections, losses, things which should not happened but happened-- flashed. Just wanted to tell him-- It is ok. Time will heal you, brother. But I did tell him- how incredibly proud i am of him.. of him maintaining the composure and taking it in the chin. Principles first. but then the loss is their.
Rejections and losses.
Another very close friend told me about crying all night because of loss of a close relation.I felt deeply, no amount of love was enough, no words were kind enough. No solace big enough.
2 different end of spectrum. But personal losses nevertheless.You cannot clarify, you cannot judge. You cannot answer why ?
Dealing with loss- one easy way is to take refuge in some of the excellent books. I have always referred to Bhagwad Gita, Tuesdays with morrie and The last lecture for solace during personal loss.
In truth- we all know Death is inevitable but we want to stretch.. we donot want to believe. The day we are able to stare death at the eye and say-- it is time. i am afraid no more.. the doubts will melt. if it is time... then it is time to go. It is very simple. But we question.. why?
When it is loss or rejection-- for no fault of ours- we again question-- why me? There are increasing cases of depression and young kids-- thinking it to be a disease. All they have to do is think out and talk. Surround yourself with people who are positive, who really care about you. typically they maynot be the first one to like your fb post or IG post but will speak up or stand up for you always. If you have good mentor, good teachers, good friends- then the work of tackling the loss is easier.
It is good to cry, good to grieve, Good to say i donot know , good to feel the pain. But then we have to channelise- the pain and loss.
Visualise oneself to overcome that pain, now that it has happened-- what next? what is the next best possible thing. if you visualise that next best thing- you will get there. always happens.
But , waited... till he can tell it by himself. A test again that i do for my fellow soldiers-- am i correct in judging this young man to be a great individual. And I was not wrong....
While returning from the visit- in auto- over the din of Bangalore traffic- he finally told--" Sambit, I have decided to call off my wedding".I allowed him to explain the background. All the while I was actually feeling myself in his shoes. The years of rejections, losses, things which should not happened but happened-- flashed. Just wanted to tell him-- It is ok. Time will heal you, brother. But I did tell him- how incredibly proud i am of him.. of him maintaining the composure and taking it in the chin. Principles first. but then the loss is their.
Rejections and losses.
Another very close friend told me about crying all night because of loss of a close relation.I felt deeply, no amount of love was enough, no words were kind enough. No solace big enough.
2 different end of spectrum. But personal losses nevertheless.You cannot clarify, you cannot judge. You cannot answer why ?
Dealing with loss- one easy way is to take refuge in some of the excellent books. I have always referred to Bhagwad Gita, Tuesdays with morrie and The last lecture for solace during personal loss.
In truth- we all know Death is inevitable but we want to stretch.. we donot want to believe. The day we are able to stare death at the eye and say-- it is time. i am afraid no more.. the doubts will melt. if it is time... then it is time to go. It is very simple. But we question.. why?
When it is loss or rejection-- for no fault of ours- we again question-- why me? There are increasing cases of depression and young kids-- thinking it to be a disease. All they have to do is think out and talk. Surround yourself with people who are positive, who really care about you. typically they maynot be the first one to like your fb post or IG post but will speak up or stand up for you always. If you have good mentor, good teachers, good friends- then the work of tackling the loss is easier.
It is good to cry, good to grieve, Good to say i donot know , good to feel the pain. But then we have to channelise- the pain and loss.
Visualise oneself to overcome that pain, now that it has happened-- what next? what is the next best possible thing. if you visualise that next best thing- you will get there. always happens.
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